Overcooked

Too much introspection 

Yet not enough 

Too much brash behavior

Yet that's what they want

Too much anxiety

Too much caring

Too much trying not to care

Too fucking much. 

Why can't I just be a boring person? 

To Blame

I know I'm the one creating the divide. 

I know I'm the one suffering. 

Struggling. 

I doubt myself every single day. 

I wonder if this is the life I truly want to lead. 

When in my heart,

I know that it's not. 

Is the love you have for me,

enough to allow you to change

for me?

Will you give up almost everything,

like I did to be with you?

But then 

what will we have left? 

Not Leaving

I refuse to let you leave just yet

it's too soon, too brutal, too much. 

I now understand why 

they call it "Battling Cancer"

Your body is a war zone,

cuts, and deeper cuts,

scars, and thicker scars,

bruises, and darker bruises

skin grafts. 

...

And then there's the battle we can't see

the raging inferno of hell

imbedded deep within your cells.

I need you to stay,

but how selfish does that make me? 

Tipping Point

At what point

do we decide

to call it quits?

When do the scales 

Shift

and become too heavy

to adjust back?

Who wins?

Who loses?

Who doesn't?

Cages

The city dwellers

Drive to Nature Centers

to see wildlife

In cages. 

Animals they call their,

"Spirit Animal"

In.

Cages.

When the reality is 

that there is nothing 

more beautiful 

than nature in its

Wild habitat. 

Eagles soaring high and free,

Owls hunting prey in the night,

Deer bounding over creeks and streams,

Prairie grasses bowing in the breeze.

The parallels here 

are too juicy to pass up.

Humans in the city 

On display

In cages. 

Illusions

I fear that 

the idea of You

is better than

the real You 

And

the idea of Me

is worse than 

the reality I live

But

the idea of

You and Me

is simply

Tragic. 

Silence

Because sometimes

There need be no reason

Often times 

There is nothing

Learning 

How to handle the silence

Is the hardest part